To the man i have loved, and still.. Thank you for letting me feel that i was somewhat special. Thanks for all the encouragements during those times that i was soo down. Thanks for being there to just listen and not argue. Thanks for sharing the pains that life brought me. Thanks for those nights you were also sleepless just to help me ease the pains of life unpleasantries. Thank you for telling and letting me feel that I'm pretty inside and out. Thanks for loving and accepting me for who I am. Thanks for letting me love you.. Goodbye..

Such a memorable night... I was smiling the whole time.. afraid to show how much it pains me

A time when you started to hate being loved and cared by A FRIEND

Rant!

This isn't fair . It's the worst feeling in the world . To completely feel as if you were never good enough . To completely feel as if you were never what they wanted . To completely feel as if your world is crashing down . I don't know if I've ever been in love , but all I know is that it's the closest thing we have to magic .Just because im a tough girl doesn't make the chance of falling in love any less . Just stfu . We , humans , were born to think that love is non-existance at the age of highschoolers , that it's something that will mess you up , or simply something that will make you regret . But how can you say such a thing about love . Love is the most beautiful thing , that has been created . No , I'm not talking about middle school love , where it's only been two weeks , I'm talking about the kind of love that is between two people that has always been there for each other , that just wants the other person to be happy even if that meant with someone else , that has a connection like no other . Idgaf , about what people say about falling in love , it can happen . I'm not saying that , this goes for every relationship , but the ones that have been through a lot .

Confuse..

If you are going to love me, love me deeply. If you break my heart, then break it all. If you are going to care, care for me completely. If you decide not to hold me, then just let me fall. If you are going to stay, then stay forever. And if you want to leave, then do it today. If you are going to change, change for the better. And if you are going to talk, then please mean what you say.

And I can’t help but wonder how normal it is to feel this way. I mean, here I am, in the throes of the most amazing man I have ever known-someone who has so quickly become my world-and I can’t help but question it all. I have never been more sure of my feelings for anyone and never have I been so insecure about someone’s feelings for me. I don’t know what to do but I’m never giving up on you.

If I could give you one thing in life, I would give you the ability to see yourself through my eyes, only then would you realize how special you are to me…

It hurts to love someone when we can’t tell them what we really feel because sometimes we get hurt without them knowing. We get jealous even if we have no right to feel that way. We want their time even if we are not in the position to demand for it. Although our hearts are breaking in silence, we still continue to love them because somehow in this hurtful love there is still hope of having simple moments with them even if it means being just a friend.

First week of 2012

First week on 2012..

It started really FUN and tiring..

Work - ugh nothing special..
love - Finally, we talked..
Friendship - a mess.. Hurt, judged, misunderstood and betrayed
Family - missing my mom when we were kids!, when i started to like a guy, when everything is being handled by her. missing my sister so much! MISSING MY FAMILY :(((