I know its okay to feel the hurt, the pain and to be drowned in melancholy. After all, It makes me feel I am human... I am still human. I was afraid at first. I didnt know what to do. I was confused, so confused that I need to ask for my friend's opinions. Give it a try. Who knows, maybe he is the one you've been waiting for. The one you've been asking for. The one who could satisfy your needs and make you feel safe always. The one you can cherish and lastly, the one who will LOVE you. LOVE? I never heard about it since my last relationship. Love is full of surprises. Love is always associated with pain and sacrifices. Love is sharing, caring and giving. Love is a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker. What is LOVE? for me, Love is much like a wild rose, beautiful and calm, but willing to draw blood in its defense. Love is a symbol of eternity. It wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end. But since then, Love is just another word I never learned to pronounce... With the hunger for "love" and missing the feeling of being "in-love", I took my chance. Who can tell, this might going to be one amazing life. but I'm still afraid... afraid it may not work. afraid it may not be as good as i could think of. afraid of falling and not knowing if there is a solid ground below. afraid of being the first to fall in love and the first to feel the hurt. afraid of everything... I still pushed my luck. chatting. exchanging thoughts and point of views. asking things i never thought i could ask. jokes. play time. mellow-dramatic lines. over-reacting traits. demands. tears. unethical behaviors. boredom. missing-you punchlines. songs to rekindle. dramas. serious-to-kidding talks. perversion. crying-time. love and romance. all over again... And the hardest part of all... the moment of truth. Am I ready to set the fire to the third bar? Am I ready to take my chance again? Am I ready to whatever is going to happen? Am I ready to love again? I'm so scared... not the fact that things might go on my way, but I am scared for my heart.. My fragile heart that was broken before... I dont think I could endure another pain... Falling in love with someone isn't always going to be easy... anger... tears... laughter.. It's when you want to be together despite it all. That's when you truly love one another. There's definitely a dangerous feeling when you're in love.. it's giving your heart to someone else and knowing that they have control over your feelings. I know for me, who always tries to be so tough, that's the dangerous thing. Your enemies, whether perceived or known, can never hurt you the way your loved ones can....It is the people closer to your heart that can give it the most piercing wound! It is always a roller coaster ride. Points where you’ll be at the very top almost reaching The God above and at a dreadfully bottom almost friends with Satan. Love that we can not have is the one that lasts the longest, hurts the deepest and feels the strongest... Life is indeed full of contradictions. Sometimes, its crazy to be sane. You need to fall to fly. People suffer because you care. You have to unlearn to know the lesson. You have to give up because you are strong. You have to be wrong to make things right. once i think it is the right thing to do, i persists my beliefs no matter how costly it would be. And after all is said and done... I will stay... I will wait... I have been waiting for so long and the opportunity that I have at this moment, I have to hold on to it. I have to work for it. I should keep on chasing pavements, even if it leads nowhere. To love you was a treason against my religion but not to love you is a treason against my heart...

To the man i have loved, and still.. Thank you for letting me feel that i was somewhat special. Thanks for all the encouragements during those times that i was soo down. Thanks for being there to just listen and not argue. Thanks for sharing the pains that life brought me. Thanks for those nights you were also sleepless just to help me ease the pains of life unpleasantries. Thank you for telling and letting me feel that I'm pretty inside and out. Thanks for loving and accepting me for who I am. Thanks for letting me love you.. Goodbye..

Such a memorable night... I was smiling the whole time.. afraid to show how much it pains me

A time when you started to hate being loved and cared by A FRIEND

Rant!

This isn't fair . It's the worst feeling in the world . To completely feel as if you were never good enough . To completely feel as if you were never what they wanted . To completely feel as if your world is crashing down . I don't know if I've ever been in love , but all I know is that it's the closest thing we have to magic .Just because im a tough girl doesn't make the chance of falling in love any less . Just stfu . We , humans , were born to think that love is non-existance at the age of highschoolers , that it's something that will mess you up , or simply something that will make you regret . But how can you say such a thing about love . Love is the most beautiful thing , that has been created . No , I'm not talking about middle school love , where it's only been two weeks , I'm talking about the kind of love that is between two people that has always been there for each other , that just wants the other person to be happy even if that meant with someone else , that has a connection like no other . Idgaf , about what people say about falling in love , it can happen . I'm not saying that , this goes for every relationship , but the ones that have been through a lot .

Confuse..

If you are going to love me, love me deeply. If you break my heart, then break it all. If you are going to care, care for me completely. If you decide not to hold me, then just let me fall. If you are going to stay, then stay forever. And if you want to leave, then do it today. If you are going to change, change for the better. And if you are going to talk, then please mean what you say.

And I can’t help but wonder how normal it is to feel this way. I mean, here I am, in the throes of the most amazing man I have ever known-someone who has so quickly become my world-and I can’t help but question it all. I have never been more sure of my feelings for anyone and never have I been so insecure about someone’s feelings for me. I don’t know what to do but I’m never giving up on you.

If I could give you one thing in life, I would give you the ability to see yourself through my eyes, only then would you realize how special you are to me…

It hurts to love someone when we can’t tell them what we really feel because sometimes we get hurt without them knowing. We get jealous even if we have no right to feel that way. We want their time even if we are not in the position to demand for it. Although our hearts are breaking in silence, we still continue to love them because somehow in this hurtful love there is still hope of having simple moments with them even if it means being just a friend.